Falling Into Danger

In the past, I thought of the Eros that Lewis speaks of as something that should be completely controlled by reason: I thought that the person you fall in love with should/must meet specific criteria, the standards that we talk about when we talk about dating (blonde, has a nice car, goes to Bible study at least three times a week, etc.).

But what I read from Lewis is a different picture of how "falling in love" works. It really is like falling, like the force of gravity. Maybe, like Eugene said in class, you cannot choose. As Lewis says, you may feel Eros for a person whom you know may not lead to your permanent happiness, and yet you still want to be with your Beloved. Lewis says that if you haven't felt that way about a person, then you've never been really "in love". Eros calls you to give up everything--your parents' approval, success, sometimes even your conscience if you let it. Lovers only want the other; "People in love cannot be moved by kindness and opposition makes them feel like martyrs" (110).

So, this brings some questions to my mind: If Eros can be so potentially dangerous should we, as Christians, allow this danger in to our lives? Should we banish every hint of Eros before it takes its full effect and develops to the point that it could be dangerous or that we have no control? You could say, that would stop reproduction and things; however, as we know, there were days when marriages didn't depend on love like we think they should now--maybe we should go back to arranged marriages. At least that way you couldn't fall in love with an objectionable person, unless you wanted to commit adultery, that is.

Ideas to ponder...